SeniorSeeker
Active member
[size=x-large]QUOTES & JOKES[/size]
The problem with political jokes is they get elected.
~ Henry Cate, VII
We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.
~ Aesop
If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these acceptance speeches there wouldn't be any inducement to go to heaven.
~ Will Rogers
Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.
~ Plato
Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.
~ Nikita Khrushchev
When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it
~ Clarence Darrow
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you.
~ Author Unknown
If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.
~ Jay Leno
Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel.
~ John Quinton
Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other.
~ Oscar Ameringer
I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them.
~ Adlai Stevenson - Campaign Speech, 1952
A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
~ Texas Guinan
Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so.
~ Gore Vidal
I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.
~ Charles de Gaulle
Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
~ Ronald Reagan
Politics: [Poly "many" + tics "blood-sucking parasites"]
~ Larry Hardiman
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.
~ Doug Larson
Don't vote, it only encourages them.
~ Author Unknown
There ought to be one day -- just one -- when there is open season on senators.
~ Will Rogers
The problem with political jokes is they get elected.
~ Henry Cate, VII
We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to public office.
~ Aesop
If we got one-tenth of what was promised to us in these acceptance speeches there wouldn't be any inducement to go to heaven.
~ Will Rogers
Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber.
~ Plato
Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there is no river.
~ Nikita Khrushchev
When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it
~ Clarence Darrow
Why pay money to have your family tree traced; go into politics and your opponents will do it for you.
~ Author Unknown
If God wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.
~ Jay Leno
Politicians are people who, when they see light at the end of the tunnel, go out and buy some more tunnel.
~ John Quinton
Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other.
~ Oscar Ameringer
I offer my opponents a bargain: if they will stop telling lies about us, I will stop telling the truth about them.
~ Adlai Stevenson - Campaign Speech, 1952
A politician is a fellow who will lay down your life for his country.
~ Texas Guinan
Any American who is prepared to run for president should automatically, by definition, be disqualified from ever doing so.
~ Gore Vidal
I have come to the conclusion that politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.
~ Charles de Gaulle
Politics is supposed to be the second-oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.
~ Ronald Reagan
Politics: [Poly "many" + tics "blood-sucking parasites"]
~ Larry Hardiman
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.
~ Doug Larson
Don't vote, it only encourages them.
~ Author Unknown
There ought to be one day -- just one -- when there is open season on senators.
~ Will Rogers