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A somber day...

Sgt. Silverman

Active member
Went to the homestead this morning and a light snow began to fall. It was very peaceful. Funny how things can change on a dime though. :blink: I've only used my EX2 once (I bought it used) so today I figured I'd give it a whirl. I had to call Mike the last time I was out there because it was acting erratic. Well, nothing changed today. I think it needs to be looked at by Minelab. I brought the AT Gold and instead of breaking it out, I loaded the EX2 in the car and decided to explore the property. Over 200 acres, there's a lot of ground to cover!

The owner had told me of an old cemetery in the woods and gave me some so-so directions. I went down a deer path about an 1/8 mile from the chimney stack and went in about 100 ft from the path and finally found the family cemetery. (It was "Briar-ville" in there too.) I looked at the headstones (I have put a slide show together out on my Spot On website at the end tab with the AT Gold info) and realized that two (at least the ones that were marked) were babies. 2 months old and 1 month old. That hit home hard. Alissa and I lost Jordan 11 years ago to Trisomy 18 (she was stillborn) and although I am at peace that she is in heaven, the moment got the best of me because in times like these I can remember what it was like having to actually watch our own child being buried. I think I stayed out there at least a half hour out in the middle of nowhere in Taylorsville, NC unintentially living vicariously through these people and what life must have been like back then. It was a somber moment to say the least.

I tried to shake the attack of sadness being dispatched from the pit of hell, so I actually jogged (I have to start running again, geez) back to the car, grabbed the AT Gold and just tried to tune everything out. After about an hour I called it quits, my heart just wasn't into it. As I got in the car I kept thinking, "There's a whole family back there who's lives were just like mine, they were married had children, lost children and finally went home to the Lord themselves." It just goes to show how quickly life can go by and why we need to lead everyone that we can to Jesus and lead fruitful lives ourselves.

The headstones of the babies nagged at me all the way home. Again, I tried to push it away and by the time I got home I got on here, read some posts, commented and then played 5 games of chess with the kids before Al took them shopping. I'm rambling here sorry. I guess what I'm getting at is I haven't had a heaviness on my heart like this in a long time. So if I may, I would like to request prayers for peace and I will close. God Bless and thank you in advance for viewing the pictures and for the prayers. :)
 
Greg, I am sorry to hear of your sadness and rough day. On days like this I remember Jeremiah 29:11 and know that GOD's plans are for us to be happy and to press on. Oftentimes this works for me, but the reality is...some days are just rotten and that's okay. God knows our hearts....he knew of our future circumstances and emotions before he even created us. I will be praying for you. I do not know the heartache of having a child reach term and be stillborn, but I do know the heartache of miscarriage...five times over. God Bless you!
 
and be with Jesus some-glad-day and we will see our loved ones who have gone on before! Little ones have no sin and my grandson, Gregory, passed away by SIDS at 3-1/2 months and was so awful on my daughter Tami and for all of us! I thought she would never get over it enough to live on and be happier, but she has as it has been a long, long time since his passing on back to God! She and I look forward to seeing him and all our saved loved ones but only in God's timing! I am so sorry about your loss and cannot know how it hurts the soul because I haven't lost a baby or a child and I pray that I don't, for I should pass away first but one never knows when our last breath is done and we are no longer here in these temporary clay bodies...but oh what a glorious body we shall have when we meet Jesus in the air when caught up to meet Him in the air! Yes, more babies didn't live in the times of fewer drs and meds compared to what we have now!

My mom lost her first son, Bobby, to pneumonia at about 3 months of age also! My great-aunt lost twins and they are buried in the corner of our family cemetery before there were very many graves! Time goes on though with healing and with others born and with the Lord's blessings of comfort and peace given to those, who don't even know Him in their sorrows, is a wonderful gift which no one can purchase, for Jesus paid the price in full for our sins and He loves us with an everlasting love to help us to endure and overcome all things...even the death of babies and loved ones! Praise God and Bless His Holy name! Be at peace for Jesus loves you and your wife and He cares for us everyone, whether saved or unsaved, but we can't be with Him forever unless we believe in Who He is by loving and obeying Him, Who is the Living Word giving us The Holy Spirit, Who is our guide and comforter by allowing Him to do so! Amen! :angel: Ma
 
n/t
 
You are not rambling,you are normal....My first wife and I were married June 10,1978.My oldest daughter was delivered stillborn,March 10,1979,9 months to the day of our wedding day.Her name was(is) Victoria Lynn Marie.After all these years,it still hurts...I honestly believe this is part of the reason my first marriage didn't last,my wife was never quite the same,afterwards....Sgt.Silverman,I know exactly how you feel,it would have happened to me,too.......BEEN THERE,EXPERIENCED THAT.....Steve.
 
still struggles with losing Gregory at 3-1/2 months! Sometimes we are often dealt a hard blow or many of them, but Jesus cares and with Him we can overcome but still grieve for what could have been a great joy of having the children to have and to hold.....I had shots to keep from miscarrying Tami and I would never have had it any other way for she is a blessing to me and my love for her and my other two are often more than I can bear! My ex also wanted me to have her aborted (killed) and there is no way that I ever could do that....premeditated murder that only God can forgive us for, but I would have had a very difficult time forgiving myself and him! Prayers for you, Liz and Greg! May God's mercy be with you all everyday and also those who have lost a child before and after being born and even later in life, for my sister-in-law's mother said, losing Joel at 42 was the hardest thing that she had to bear....parents are supposed to go before their children! Love you everyone in Christ's love and your sorrows are my sorrows too, as a Sister-in-Christ, for we are all brothers and sisters! Amen! :angel: Ma
 
Thank you everyone for your prayers. Peace definitely came and I had a very relaxing day and a great time at church this morning.

Liz, Travis, Steve and Ma, I am so sorry for your losses as well. It's difficult to find the right words to say to someone that has lost a child(ren) and grandchildren, (people would tell me that all the time) but I will say that I am 100 % positive all of our children are playing right now and soaking in the love of Jesus Christ and waiting patiently for us to come home! God Bless all of you and thank you so much for sharing as well and it's comforting to know we are all a family out here.

Have a Blessed week everyone!

Greg
 
Life has been described as a "veil of tears" and it often is. Sadly, we all have times like you described so well Greg.
And who could understand the pain that you have suffered.
But good has come from it.
No one can watch Allisa's video presentation without knowing that God was there, is there and will be there for you all.
It is a wonderful testimony to the Lord and has been, and will yet be, a blessing to many more.
I can easily have tears looking back on our losses too, and on my failures and regrets, but you "can't saw sawdust" as they say so you just have to move on.
But now and again you get caught out unexpectedly, as you were.
The following illustrates a different type of matter but I think it is a helpful example.
When the disciples let Jesus down by going to sleep when He was praying about the crucifixion that was just about to happen Jesus was disappointed in them.
They failed Him at the very centrepoint of history really.
But hear what He said, "Sleep on now, and take your rest: behold, the hour is at hand, and the Son of man is betrayed into the hands of sinners."
They had let Him down,as I do, and yet He took into account their need of rest.
However then He said "Rise, let us be going: behold, he is at hand that doth betray Me."
That's about it really, the past is over, there is nothing that can now be done about your failure or painful experiences, or whatever it was, so "Arise let us be going."
That is get on with it, there is much for you to do.
So these sad moments will and do occur and we are caught out by sudden emotions.
But in a strange way they re-charge us for the future and arm us with experience that will help someone somewhere.
The Lord does not waste things.
We see God's hand in our past, His comfort, His forgiveness and are reminded of His faithfulness so we "Arise and get going".
That seems to be how it is and our faithful God is ever leading us onwards.
I know that the Lord will bless you and yours Greg, and all who follow Him.
 
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