Jim West Pa
New member
NEVER HEARD CREATION EXPLAINED THIS WAY BEFORE !!!
In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the
Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach,
green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman
would live long and healthy lives.
Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben
and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it,
add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And
Satan smiled. And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman
might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth
white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them.
And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan
presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following
the repast. God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth
deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own
platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.
God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food
Cake," and said, "It is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."
God then brought forth running shoes so that His
children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a
remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels.
And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light
and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low
in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful
skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And
Man gained pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume
fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created
McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want
fries with that?"
And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!" And Satan said, "It is
good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.
Then Satan created HMOs.
In the beginning, God created the Heavens and the
Earth and populated the Earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach,
green and yellow and red vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman
would live long and healthy lives.
Then using God's great gifts, Satan created Ben
and Jerry's Ice Cream and Krispy Creme Donuts. And Satan said, "You want chocolate with that?" And Man said, "Yes!" and Woman said, "and as long as you're at it,
add some sprinkles." And they gained 10 pounds. And
Satan smiled. And God created the healthful yogurt that Woman
might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth
white flour from the wheat, and sugar from the cane and combined them.
And Woman went from size 6 to size 14.
So God said, "Try my fresh green salad." And Satan
presented Thousand-Island Dressing, buttery croutons and garlic toast on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following
the repast. God then said, "I have sent you heart healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them." And Satan brought forth
deep fried fish and chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own
platter. And Man gained more weight and his cholesterol went through the roof.
God then created a light, fluffy white cake, named it "Angel Food
Cake," and said, "It is good." Satan then created chocolate cake and named it "Devil's Food."
God then brought forth running shoes so that His
children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan gave cable TV with a
remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels.
And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering blue light
and gained pounds.
Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low
in fat and brimming with nutrition. And Satan peeled off the healthful
skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep-fried them. And
Man gained pounds.
God then gave lean beef so that Man might consume
fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan created
McDonald's and its 99-cent double cheeseburger. Then said, "You want
fries with that?"
And Man replied, "Yes! And super size them!" And Satan said, "It is
good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.
God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.
Then Satan created HMOs.