C. Nyal de Kaye
New member
The following resume arrived in my mailbox this morning and I thought that it would interest many readers of these columns, so here it is.
My name is Jesus -The Christ. Many call me Lord!
I've sent you my resume because I'm seeking the top management position in your heart. Please consider my accomplishments as set forth in my resume.
Address: Ephesians 1:20
Phone: Romans 10:13
Website: The Bible. Keywords: Christ, Lord, Saviour and Jesus
Qualifications
I founded the earth and established the heavens, (See Proverbs 3:19)
I formed man from the dust of the ground, (See Genesis 2:7)
I breathed into man the breath of life, (See Genesis 2:7)
I redeemed man from the curse of the law, (See Galatians 3:13)
The blessings of the Abrahamic Covenant comes upon your life through me, (See Galatians 3:14)
____________________________________________________________________
Occupational Background
I've only had one employer, (See Luke 2:49 ).
I've never been tardy, absent, disobedient, slothful or disrespectful.
My employer has nothing but rave reviews for me, (See Matthew 3:15 -17)
____________________________________________________________________
Skills and Work Experience
Some of my skills and work experiences include: empowering the poor to be poor no more, healing the broken hearted, setting the captives free, healing the sick, restoring sight to the blind and setting at liberty them that are bruised, (See Luke 4:1
.
I am a Wonderful Counselor, (See Isaiah 9:6). People who listen to me shall dwell safely and shall not fear evil, (See Proverbs 1:33 ).
Most importantly, I have the authority, ability and power to cleanse you of your sins, (See I John 1:7-9)
_____________________________________________________________________
Educational Background
I encompass the entire breadth and length of knowledge, wisdom and understanding, (See Proverbs 2:6).
In Me are hid all of the treasures of wisdom and knowledge, (See Colossians 2:3).
My Word is so powerful; it has been described as being a lamp unto your feet and a light unto your path (See Psalms 119:105).
I can even tell you all of the secrets of your heart, (See Psalms 44:21).
_____________________________________________________________________
Major Accomplishments
I was an active participant in the greatest Summit Meeting of all times, (See Genesis 1:26 ).
I laid down My life so that you may live, (See II Corinthians 5:15 ).
I defeated the arch enemy of God and mankind and made a show of them openly, (See Colossians 2:15 ).
I've miraculously fed the poor, healed the sick and raised the dead!
There are many more major accomplishments, too many to mention here. You can read them on my website, which is located at: www dot - the BIBLE. You don't need an Internet connection or computer to access my website.
_____________________________________________________________________
References
Believers and followers worldwide will testify to my divine healing, salvation, deliverance, miracles, restoration and supernatural guidance.
_____________________________________________________________________
Summation
Now that you've read My resume, I'm confident that I'm the only candidate uniquely qualified to fill this vital position in your heart. In summation, I will properly direct your paths, (See Proverbs 3:5-6), and lead you into everlasting life, (See John 6:47 ). When can I start? Time is of the essence, (See Hebrews 3:15 ).
[size=x-large]THE RESUME OF JESUS CHRIST[/size]
My name is Jesus -The Christ. Many call me Lord!
I've sent you my resume because I'm seeking the top management position in your heart. Please consider my accomplishments as set forth in my resume.
Address: Ephesians 1:20
Phone: Romans 10:13
Website: The Bible. Keywords: Christ, Lord, Saviour and Jesus
Qualifications
I founded the earth and established the heavens, (See Proverbs 3:19)
I formed man from the dust of the ground, (See Genesis 2:7)
I breathed into man the breath of life, (See Genesis 2:7)
I redeemed man from the curse of the law, (See Galatians 3:13)
The blessings of the Abrahamic Covenant comes upon your life through me, (See Galatians 3:14)
____________________________________________________________________
Occupational Background
I've only had one employer, (See Luke 2:49 ).
I've never been tardy, absent, disobedient, slothful or disrespectful.
My employer has nothing but rave reviews for me, (See Matthew 3:15 -17)
____________________________________________________________________
Skills and Work Experience
Some of my skills and work experiences include: empowering the poor to be poor no more, healing the broken hearted, setting the captives free, healing the sick, restoring sight to the blind and setting at liberty them that are bruised, (See Luke 4:1
.I am a Wonderful Counselor, (See Isaiah 9:6). People who listen to me shall dwell safely and shall not fear evil, (See Proverbs 1:33 ).
Most importantly, I have the authority, ability and power to cleanse you of your sins, (See I John 1:7-9)
_____________________________________________________________________
Educational Background
I encompass the entire breadth and length of knowledge, wisdom and understanding, (See Proverbs 2:6).
In Me are hid all of the treasures of wisdom and knowledge, (See Colossians 2:3).
My Word is so powerful; it has been described as being a lamp unto your feet and a light unto your path (See Psalms 119:105).
I can even tell you all of the secrets of your heart, (See Psalms 44:21).
_____________________________________________________________________
Major Accomplishments
I was an active participant in the greatest Summit Meeting of all times, (See Genesis 1:26 ).
I laid down My life so that you may live, (See II Corinthians 5:15 ).
I defeated the arch enemy of God and mankind and made a show of them openly, (See Colossians 2:15 ).
I've miraculously fed the poor, healed the sick and raised the dead!
There are many more major accomplishments, too many to mention here. You can read them on my website, which is located at: www dot - the BIBLE. You don't need an Internet connection or computer to access my website.
_____________________________________________________________________
References
Believers and followers worldwide will testify to my divine healing, salvation, deliverance, miracles, restoration and supernatural guidance.
_____________________________________________________________________
Summation
Now that you've read My resume, I'm confident that I'm the only candidate uniquely qualified to fill this vital position in your heart. In summation, I will properly direct your paths, (See Proverbs 3:5-6), and lead you into everlasting life, (See John 6:47 ). When can I start? Time is of the essence, (See Hebrews 3:15 ).
Great post!