The Bad-Luck Buck

[Arkie John]

Fred, you're so very perceptive! I wish to verify your query.

*****************

Last year was a bad year hunting wise for me. I missed a massive 7-point--the biggest I have ever seen. I didn't just miss him, I missed him BAD. Once at 35 yards and after calling him to within 20 yards, yup, shot under him--a clean miss. Never saw the ole' boy again.

Then there was the 6-point down at the creek. He came up the creek one evening late and presented me with a perfect quartering-away shot. I settled the pin and my arrow found its mark--kinda. After two days of looking with no blood, no hair, no deer and no arrow, and knowing that I saw nothing but fletching coming from his ribcage, I can only surmise that the arrow glanced off the ribs and plowed between the skin and the ribcage, leaving the boiler room virtually without damage.

So, one morning I'm on my tree stand and it is prime hunting time, about 0700. I was hunting behind my house about a half mile back in the woods. Suddenly I hear this mad woman BREAKING the silence of a golden morning, calling "JJJOOOOOHHHHNNN. JOOOOOHHHHHNNNN!!!!! WWWHHHOOOOOOOOOO HHOOOOOOOOOO! JOOOOHHHNNNNN!!!

Now I knew this was not Virginia. She had left for work as I left for the deer stand, about 0515. She was makin' me money while I was hunting. I like that scenario. But something was definitely wrong. No one in their right mind would call out and ruin a good hunt unless there was an emergency.

I had forgotten my cell phone that day--very rare for me ( I run it on "silent" and keep it just for emergencies etc when I'm hunting) / Nevertheless, I had forgotten it and did not want to lose precious time by going back and getting it. I felt a sense of foreboding as I recognized the voice as that of my daughter Ashlea!!! My heart began to race and I scaled the tree to the ground in the climber stand and this fat boy was joggin' through the woods with all I could muster.

I got to the house and Ashlea was out on the back deck. "Mom's had a car wreck and couldn't get hold of you, Dad!" "Is she okay?" She's alright, but the car is a mess and she is upset and still at the scene. She hit a deer!!!!" Well, I was relieved to hear that she was okay. The accident happened at 0530 and she could not rouse Ashlea for quite some time.

I got in my old van and headed to the scene. There was the pathetic scene. Virginia was there, tears flowing. The car was there with a crumpled hood and left front fender, no driver's side mirror...a mess. And...there was the deer, a full grown buck, probably 150 pounds, with long, straight spikes about 14 inches tall. Not a legal deer here in this state. "The police said you could have the deer, John" Virginia said. So after I settled Virginia down and got her in the car with our son, Kyle (to continue to work) I promptly did what every self-respecting Arkansas redneck would do. I rassled that puppy into the old van and off I went.

THAT, was an expensive deer. I carry only liability on Virginia's old 1999 Intrepid so the bill was going to be paid by the OTHER insurer...Garrett and Company. Savvy??? So the damage came to about 1500 bucks (no pun intended). As I skinned out and butchered the spike, I had a certain sense of "get even" when doing so.

The year went just like that and I did not score a deer all season. But let me tell you one thing. THAT deer gives me a certain sense of revenge when I dine on him and with each bite I just grin (especially when I forget about the money I spent on that bless-ed Intrepid.

So, YES WE errr I DO eat road kill and I gloat at the fact that THAT deer will NEVER crease another vehicle of mine EVER~

Since I still have plenty of the the ole boy in the freezer, you all just come on by and I'll show you what good eatin' is really all about.

Don't knock it 'til you try it, Cowboy (and friends) Thanks for comin' along. I kinda liked the conversation.

aj

 

[Kelley (Texas)]

while it is still fresh...just been killed by the vehicle. Are you the only one in the family that has eaten any of that deer that your wife killed with the car? Is this the only time that you have eaten any "road kill" food? For some reason, I am having a problem with the thought of eating "road kill" food, could be because by the time I see the dead animal, it has been dead in the road for at least several hours.

Also, do you only hunt deer with a bow and arrow? Have you ever hunted wild pigs with the bow and arrow? Thanks for telling me about the "road kill" deer that you ate. Please have a great day! Kelley (Texas)

 

[Wayne in BC]

very fortunate that Virginia was ok and damage was fixable. We have a huge problem with Deer on the roads here along with many happy and fat Turkey Vultures and Ravens. Body shops love it!
Sad but excellent story bud

 

[Arkie John]

...it's a lot less expensive that way and I don't have to take guff from me friends about road-kill.

This will be my FIRST full-time pursuit, (retiring 30 September) and I look forward to it. Maybe....just maybe the ole' boy will score one this year.

aj

 

[Arkie John]

...if I cannot verify when it was killed. It is unsafe to attempt to prepare road-kill if one does not know how long it has been dead.

Once Dad found a wild turkey in the woods during the spring. It had been hit and happened to get away from the hunter, but he decided that since it was still warm that he would take it home. No sense in wasting good meat. Well, once home, he began to prepare the animal and he soon realized that he had made a mistake.

What he thought was body heat was probably heat from the morning sun. As a fourteen or fifteen year-old, I laughed and Daddy was NOT amused! The turkey went into the garbage can and I went silent...grinnin' every once in a while.

We ALL have dined on that Bad-Luck buck, but the rest of the family don't think of it as road-kil, since Virginia killed it.

I have nothing against gun hunters. I hunted with them until 2000, at which time I rediscovered bow hunting. At that point, I figured I had taken enough game with a thunder stick...and I didn't care if I ever killed anything else, so I started bow hunting exclusively from that day. It has been an enjoyable quest, I must say. I praise the Lord every day from my good health and the strength to still traipse around in the woods and to have the ability to shoot a 70 lb bow.

With a little luck and blessings from above, I will take my 16th turkey with a bow and my 9th deer (I think).

Thanks for rousing my memory. I'd forgotten about him almost and only last evening realized there was a story in there somewhere.

aj

One final thought: I read a story about some Hell's Angels barbecuing a road-kill coyote (this was back in the 60's) and they were so macho in doing so. Those idiots gather 'round the table fare and proved their manliness by consuming hearty portions. It wasn't long that most of them wound up at the local ER puking their guts up, like any other vulture that dines on......ROAD-KILL! True story.

 

[Micheal_R]

That would be a 3 point up here Arkie!!!... But, at least Virginia was not hurt. I have plowed into a couple up here too. Unfortunately, they have a pretty good case of road rash and are all but unusable after I hit them. And after I hit them, they are thrashing around and I have to take the knife to insure they do not suffer.

Nowadays, I always carry a .22 in case that happens again>>

Calm seas

Mikie

 

[Arkie John]

The Bad-Luck buck - Road kill - is good eatin'~

You got roads up thar???

aj

 

[George-CT]

No point in letting it go to waste. My last bike came from a guy because a deer jumped in his lap and gave him a lap dance. Rolled them both onto the side of the crash bars. Neither was hurt and the deer took off. He had few cuts on his legs from the hoofs, and broke a brake lever, mirror and a few minor scratches. But his wife told him it had to go. So I got a great deal on it. Rode it for 2 years and sold and made money on it. Nice Yamaha Venture, fully loaded. I've seen him since then and he finally did get a new Harley sportster.

They are hard on cars around here also. A lot of our corn fields run higher on one side of the road and usually have stone walls running along side the road, so they leap over them and there they are, no warning at all. Rut season here its dangerous on these back roads.

Good story.

Geo-CT

 

[Arkie John]

I also hope that I have fully outgrown motorcycles. Alls I have now is a 1974 Honda Trail 90 with 1,300 original miles on it. It is sentimental or I wouldn't have that one, probably. I've had them since the age of 12 and now, I HOPE I have got my last one.

I must admit, when I go into a cafe and see a bunch of those chome horses parked out in front, my pulse quickens and I have to get away quickly. I always wanted a Harley and was never able to afford one. Now that I can afford one, I HOPE I no longer really want one. But you can't ever tell. Naaawwwww. I'm done with 'em (I think)

Thanks for postin' buddy.

aj

 

[Micheal_R]

n/t

 

[Micheal_R]

n/t

 

[Dan-MO]

One morning a few seasons ago......I ran over a small 6 pointer on the WAY to my deer stand! After contacting the game warden and getting the ok as well as a confirmation number....I loaded it in the back of my truck and continued on to the woods. Not 2 hours later I shot a 4 pointer which was loaded in the truck along side the 6 pointer. I figure I scored a 10 pointer combined for the day! After the meat was processed you couldn't tell which was which!

 

[Arkie John]

n/t

 

[Micheal_R]

n/t

 

[Royal]

a couple buddies and I were out scouting for some deer. I can not remember if we were well lubricated but we probably were. I saw a half dozen pats setting in the road. My buddy yelled, "GET UM" and I swerved to get um. They flew up and to the right and I followed at about 35mph, into the ditch and field beyond it.

Splat-splat-splat they went and I got three of the suckers, knocked the crap out of the car but it was my buddies. He shouldn'ta outta said Get Um if he didn't want um got!

We did eat them and they were good. What dumbasses

 

[Arkie John]

...and you all got to eat good too!

That's funny to think of some of the crazy stuff we did as kids or young adults.

I gotta a story comin' in the next couple of days, now that I think about it.

aj